I walked into the bedroom at the end of a long Saturday of cleaning, running errands and taking care of other family business. I noticed it immediately. The package torn, the contents spilling out on the surface that I had carefully decluttered and dusted just hours earlier.

One of my favorite author “couples” is John and Stasi Eldredge. And one of my favorite things about working with young couples is premarital counseling. Hubby is performing a wedding in October and we are weeks into a video series around the book Love and War by the Eldredges. So we snuggled up on the sofa Sunday afternoon and watched the video that we would later share with our sweet little engaged couple. As John and Stasi began to talk about the danger and subtlety of Satan’s lies as “agreements”, I knew I had a fresh, real life example.

An “agreement” as John and Stasi define it, is a lie that originates with Satan. Satan, the father of lies (John 8:44) is master at putting his spin on a situation. In the Love & War participant’s guide, they explain: “It typically comes as a thought or feeling. She doesn’t really love you. He’ll never change. She’s always doing that. (By the way, when the word “always” is part of the equation, you know you are well into an agreement.)”[1]

We’ve been at this marriage thing for a l-o-n-g time…forty three years and counting, but it is so easy to miss the obvious and settle for the lies of the enemy.

That Saturday afternoon, the thought that passed through my head was this: “He doesn’t care about your hard work. He disrespects you.” And in that moment, I could agree with the thought and move to anger, or choose the truth about my husband of so many years.

He loves me. He is so thankful for the way that I care for our home. He appreciates the effort required.

I wish I could tell you that I always recognize the deceit and cunning of our enemy. As we discussed this later with our engaged cuties, we talked about how the Bible describes Satan as a lion.

Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.
1 Peter 5:8 NIV

Since I don’t know much about lions as hunters, I read an expert, who described the lion’s acute sense of hearing, his tendency to stalk his prey and his opportunistic approach.

Basically, they hear their prey, they stalk them and they often hang out in the places their prey frequent, waiting for an opportunity to attack. This is the nature of the enemy who comes against our marriages. He listens, he lies in wait and he jumps on opportunity. Is it any wonder that we fall into the trap?

When lions in the wild want to claim territory, they don’t bury their poop. These little agreements Satan plants are the equivalent of lion poop.

Be on the alert for them and recognize that a very dangerous enemy is stalking your marriage and wants to lay claim to your home. Once you enter the agreement, you are ankle deep in lion poop.

Many of the agreements seem so true. Do any of these sound familiar?

• He/she never changes.
• I’d be better off on my own.
• I’d be happier with someone else.
• Nothing I do is ever enough.
• We should never have married.

Unlike the people who live in African jungles we don’t have to worry about encountering wild beasts that terrify entire villages, but the grim reality is that there is a beast who comes against all of us. His tactic is to pit husbands and wives against one another by planting thoughts like the ones mentioned.

I’m thankful that last Saturday, when that thought crossed my mind, years of practice took me to this in my arsenal:

He loves me. He is so thankful for the way that I care for our home. He appreciates the effort required.

And in that moment, the agreement was broken by truth. This time, I caught the scent of lion poop and stepped around it.

[1] From Love & War Participant’s Guide, The Enemy is Not Your Spouse, Page 62-63